Yes. Give it a go!

Sex has a purpose besides making babies, although, in my case, it seemed I was always making a baby – but, I digress.


Studies now confirm that people can have sex as long as they wish, but statistics say that approximately 15% of marriages are sexless!

I am assuming your sights are set a bit higher than that. To be honest, sex will probably not be the same as it was when you were both 25, but the intimacy, your ability to connect with another, may be greater than it was in youth. Older people, from long experience, have a great deal more self-awareness and self-confidence and feel released from the petty foibles of youth that had them fuming and turning their backs in the past.

When young, even with high libido, many people skip sexual intimacy because, let’s face it, they are just too tired. Toddlers, demanding jobs, money worries and arguments suggest we just go to sleep and forget it. After all, there’s always next week, next month or even next year! Yes, I know some for whom it was next year –well, to be honest, it just stopped happening. After a while, the marriage stopped happening, too.

SEX IS THE HUB OF THE WHEEL IN ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS, particularly man-woman relationships. This is because men and women think quite differently, and that can lead to unrealistic demands for the partner to be ‘just like me’. Many things that women complain about with men are really just gender differences and no amount of communication by you, dear lady, will fix him. That’s why God made girlfriends. You can have a friend just like you!

SEX MEANS APPRECIATING YOURSELF and not dwelling upon imperfections. I am not the hot babe I was even 10 years ago (why didn’t I appreciate that?!) but he may not be a chick-magnet either.  Be realistic about appearance. If you really can’t stand yourself, there are ways to improve the way you look with exercise and a healthful diet.

But I hate to exercise!

Alrighty then, accept yourself as you are and keep reading.

Although COMMUNICATION BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN flies at cross-purposes a great deal, communication about sex is important. Talking openly about your needs and desires can make the two of you closer. And yes, in this blog I am discussing only two, multiple characters are confusing.

HAVE A LAUGH ABOUT SEX! A sudden glitch in a position advised by a flexible sex counselor resulting in shouts of, “I’m so woozy!” Instead of your partner’s name need not kill the mood. Carry on and be advised that some interesting positions are just that, interesting, like the circus.

ILLNESS IS SOMETHING THAT OFTEN INTERFERES WITH SEX, particularly for older people. For example, many who have had a heart attack or heart surgery may fear sexual activity, thinking that, like in the movies, they will drop dead in the middle of it. According to my stats, for every 10,000 people who had sex once a week, only two or three had another heart attack, and not while indulging. Whew! I’ve sometimes wondered – but never mind that. Get the scoop from your doctor, not from me.

GET YOUR HEALTH UNDER CONTROL. There are other issues besides heart disease that can interfere, right? Medical conditions such as diabetes, hormonal issues, certain medications or depression can stifle sexual expression. If you suffer from one or several of these conditions, sitting on it won’t change it. Yes, menopause can make sex uncomfortable and impotence can make it impossible – I get it. But if you have stopped right there you have accepted not only defeat, but the poor health manifested with these conditions.

Is that what you really want?

MODERN MEDICINE IS AT YOUR DISPOSAL FOR SEXUAL PROBLEMS. Menopause is very treatable. Impotence is a bit concerning, as it often means circulatory disease, but this is treatable with medication and patience.

 Ignoring a partner’s needs because you ‘don’t feel like it’ is not on the roster. See what you can do to improve your health and a visit to your doctor is the place to start.

According to HelpGuide, Better Sex as You Age,


Improve mental and physical health. Sex can burn fat, cause the brain to release endorphins, and drastically reduce anxiety.

Increase lifespan. Through its health-improving benefits, a good sex life can add years to your life.

Solidify relationships. Sex is a chance to express the closeness of your deepest relationship.

Give refuge. Sex gives you a chance to escape from the sometimes harsh realities of the world.

Give it go! You’ll be glad you did.